by Alex Gerard

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released January 23, 2017

Alex Gerard alongside:

Kobi Arad — Keys (1, 5)
Charles Colwell — Cello (5)
Joe Eck — Drums (1, 3, 4, 5)
Jon Elconin — Electric Guitar (3, 4, 5)
Willis Mathewson — Tambourine (2)
Adam Tucker — Shaker (4)

All songs written, recorded, and produced by Alex Gerard

Drums and electric guitar recorded and produced by Adam Tucker at Signaturetone Recording in Minneapolis

Mastered by Greg Reierson at Rare Form Mastering in Minneapolis

Cockroach print by Sarah Young (sarah-young.co.uk)

Art formatting by Helena Schraff (helenaschraff.com)



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Alex Gerard New York

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Track Name: Pi D
Your behavior sets the score
I've got no say anymore
If I ensure my will is good
And take a look at what I've done
Then I should see
I done mistook my yearning for loving
Hey, I guess that means I'm learning or something

I let down my guard
Said I don't know who you are no more
That's the hard part
I planned to keep hope, but that went up in smoke
I read your letter, it said you'd rather lie low
So I turn away and maintain a straight gaze
Separated from the simple ways of the olden days

I'm unashamed
Cowardice and folly are commonplace
I'll be damned if that's the case
You've got a secret? I don't wanna know
No, trying to keep your imprint low

I want to play
Here in New York City it's all a game
About to up my intake
Back where I come from we don't quit until the deed is done
Nowhere to run, waiting until my freedom comes

And then I'll take a minute
You better bet I'm committed
A little change, a new sort of template
Time, be kind...

My right brain won
And I don't wanna front
That won't be fun, I reckon
I'll take the path that I can believe in
Find a little room where I can breathe
When the golden sun emerges from the dark horizon
I'm moving on

But sacrebleu!
What will you do when leisure catches up to you?
I'll wait my turn, remember that it's none of your concern
It doesn't matter where you are if you need a shot in the arm
Mere contemplation, no reservations so far
But the boy I know wouldn't lose control over dreams of his
That's not the way he is
The boy I know wouldn't be consoled by a half-good try
I know the future's mine
I'll be—
Track Name: A Serenade
I remember, when I was a kid my mama said
Not even if I done bad
Does abuse make a lick of sense
I thought it was implausible though
To find another soul who'd say that's so
But what the hell did I know?

Before I'd seen your face
I found myself safe in your warm embrace
And since that day
You've banished all my vitriol and disposed of my shame
Seeing how I could never repay my gains
A Serenade

I'm amazed, your simply unfazed
By the little boy living in my brain
They say he's enough to drive you insane
But you give him free rein
And should I let out a cry
In the throes of the night
You'll be lying by my side
And I'll be at peace as you hold me tight

I'll tell you all about Descartes
Or you'll help me find meaning in modern art
If I know who we are
We'll find a way to make the noise stay at bay
Maybe we should just stay in 6A and I will play
A Serenade
Track Name: Ivan's Retreat
Mangy Ivan came and took me away
A retreat in a cage
I'm scared but I'm lucid
Little setback, can't be that bad

A couple puffs of lye and I'm one of the guys
If you think that's watertight you're out of your mind

Come Saturday
You won't be the sultan of me
You're gonna need new machinery

Till then I'll learn to stop making boulders from stones
Just ten more piles of slop then I'm ready to go home

I'm not blue
Just destitute

Lazy afternoon, got nothing to do
But riddles and cartoons
I'm gone by the wayside
I've seen things you won't even recognize

I start to get my bearings but that you can fix
You'll give me my fair share with a series of cheap tricks

But I won't lose
I'm resolute and stronger than you

You went too far, empowered that you are
You didn't think things through
You decided like a shot in the dark
I know exactly what I'm gonna prove
When God forbid I should cut loose
Track Name: You Suit Yourself
You call me up one Sunday
I sense that something's not okay
Through a jumbled stream of phrase after phrase
I can hear you say:
I lead another life that you have never seen
So please listen to me
You and I are friends
That's where we begin and end
I wanna make that clear again

But can't you see? To the same degree
There's a lot you don't know about me
Oh well, you suit yourself
I'll try and put my feelings on the shelf

I may not be religious
But I mean nothing unkind
My ignorance might shine from time to time
But at least I tried to engage in something new
That don't accord with my worldview
Which you just wouldn't do
We never talked about nothing real
You never shared the way you feel
How could you know that I couldn't deal?

Can't you see? To the same degree
There's a lot you don't know about me
Oh well, you suit yourself
I'll go and put my feelings on the shelf

I pause
Now if I may say
I didn't need to end that way

You bailed on the show at Arlene's
I guess you had another little thing you had to be at
People said I was foolish
Although I think you're the coolest...

I just sigh and go on with my life
Nothing but a crush, it don't mean much
I step aside so our spheres don't collide
Nothing but a phase, I'll be okay
Track Name: Hold Me Closer Mama
On holy decree, swore not to tell
But I'm balling melons while I wait, so I will
This crude philosophy is good enough to read
But it ain't got enough of that change that I seek
Gladys told me what you've done
Look at you run
I said the poor boy is dead
Now I'll never know:
What was he supposed to show?

He won't be alone more than a while
The flip side of another egregious lie
You will always collide
With feelings not right
Did something happen in the field today?
You won't say, you're only gonna pray
Saying hold me closer mama

Too warm to hold
I've learned that I think it's cold
But I always get burned
And I can't leave it to chance
No I'll abstain, keep the blaze self-contained
We all reap what we sow
So please take a note
Your harvests won't grow
Till you've been so wronged, sung a somber song, and got on

Should that time coincide with the day I die
Say a bedtime prayer, I don't care
The pain is fleeting
Now the question is where should I begin being?
We'll be happy on the eastern shore
There'll be no intrusions anymore
Say hold me closer mama

You showed 'em a fight
And went down like a big strong soldier
You're safe on the inside
Be a good child and do as I told you
The only reprieve from feeling so lonely
Will be the relief of knowing you are free